But right now it is. This week and the past several outside of when Kevin is home off the ship (shame on me right?) I find myself resorting to McDonald's or Popeye's or even a quick pack of hot dogs and a couple of buns to microwave while I am feverishly working to move my life and my family forward. What a madhouse it is really trying to be all these things and slipping on a few.
For instance the house. Since I am not there much I don't pay attention to details like my other half does like, ummm dusting, not putting the toilet tissue on the roll rather than just on top of the dispenser. How bout this? How bout I was cool enough to get a new roll so that you could wipe your other side instead of desperately seeking out something to clean yourself with?
Now that the business is picking up and I am making my building more and more a place to be rather than my home, I am finding that HOME is suffering including my children getting a good meal.
I can hear the gasps now and the my lords from millions of apron clad mommies that have time in their day to bake cookies and cakes and pies and time to get down on their hands and knees and manually scrub the floors to a spit shine in their kitchens and hallways. I know, I know I am a horrible mommy. Yeah I can see you now with the wisps of your hair so perfectly in place as you bounce around your kitchens in pumps and petticoated dresses, yep I see you. Wagging you fingers at me as I follow my dreams and bring the kids and my honey along for this interesting ride called my life. Oh gasp how selfish of me right?
In today's society so many of us mothers really just don't have the time to be all of the things we wished we could be and then some to our families and ourselves.
I know for one cooking and cleaning is one of em.
Now let's be clear on one thing, a slob I am not, but I occasionally forget to put my shoes back on the shoe rack in my bedroom. Yes I do every once in a while forget to vacuum the living room and no my kitchen floors are not mopped on a daily basis as I am literally hopping over them to get down the stairs and out the door to the swap meet with two laptops, diapers and wipes and KJ in tow.
Let me give you this silly example of what happened this morning and hopefully you will understand.
I woke up at 10:24 am on a Thursday. Oh my God, how could I do that knowing that my store needs me to be there and the tenants may be looking for me. (mind you Isaac who is in the back repairing cars is no doubt already there and has let people in) that is beside the point. So how is it that I oversleep and wake up flat on my back still in the clothes I wore yesterday. ugggggggggggggggggggggggggggggh! I can't believe I did that but I did. I worked at the swap meet, had several meetings for events with KJ in tow the entire day, stopped to pick up Lili from school, met with the radio station personnel to schedule advertising and a live radio interview, and then back to the store to do more intake, get KJ down for a bit of a nap and work on my work at home job with my office closed all while I forgot that Imani does not have practice and needs to be picked up from a friends who has let her sit around til I come get her.
So I'm a bit overdrawn would you not say? Thank God for my locks as my hair would be a hot mess on a daily basis at least with them I can look like I give a damn when I leave the house.
Not once did you hear me breathe that I stopped to cook did you? There is my problem right there. I literally don't have time in my day. So the discussion has come up that it may be time to hire some help or a PA of sorts if you will. But who do you relinquish yourself to? I mean can you do that and still stay in control?
So this is what I am going to do in the meantime. Two words can save this whole thing.
Slow Cooker.
KitchenAid Slow Cooker -Stainless Steel
Either I can take it with me or I can turn it on before I leave the house and have dinner piping hot and smelling wonderful for us when I arrive from home. Either way I believe that is going to be my saving grace. At least for now.
Otherwise its back to hot dogs and Capri Sun until this finally makes sense and this portion of my life makes sense.
Til Next Time
Mamma
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